The American Dream: that intangible, nebulous mashup of ideals and lifestyle that’s credited with everything from driving millions of people to risk their lives and illegally move to this country, to our oft-vehemently self clamored superiority in most every conceivable area, over pretty much every other nation on the planet. There was a time when it’s mere mention conjured up visions of a bootstrap-led rise through the social and economic hierarchy; a move from roots to goals, driven by hard work, self sacrifice, and the freedoms afforded only by the great American beacon of liberty and democracy. Unfortunately this luster has worn thin, and entire generations are beginning to see the mascot of American opportunity and accomplishment for what it has become: a life defined by the attainment of material possessions, empty workplace ambition, never ending competition with our neighbors and perceived benchmarks of achievement, and a pervasive, soul crushing undercurrent of suffering, unfulfillment, and apathy.
It seems that we’re losing the ability to look inward for direction in life, that we increasingly seek out a path to happiness in the pages of self help books, through the words of self described experts, or worst of all in the standards (real or perceived) set by popular culture or the misleading image presented by many of our peers. A couple of days with a television, stack of magazines, or a radio will make a very compelling case that the prescription for content is instant gratification and the constant inundation of material wealth. Any hole you feel inside can be easily filled by a designer bag, new pair of shoes, or luxury car. Even more conveniently, you won’t have any time to feel that pain when your life is consumed by a desire to make more money (to afford all of this stuff, of course). What you’ll never hear mentioned in the commerce-driven media is that your income is compensation for your time, or to put it bluntly, a portion of your life.
When viewed from this perspective, a high salary (though there are exceptions) is truly indicative only of a large amount of time invested in work. While there’s nothing wrong with this, unless you are fortunate enough to be filled with a desire to spend most of your time on work for reasons beyond external metrics, you are essentially trading personal fulfillment for cash. Few people ever take the time to truly consider the relative value of the free time to pursue that which is interesting and satisfying, vs the acquisition of a nicer home and fancier car. The argument can be made that increased monetary wealth provides the freedom and opportunity to pursue our interests, but consider the life of a person working 60+ hours a week in a high paying job. By the time we factor in the time spent each morning preparing for work, the time spent working at home, the time spent commuting, the time spent of familial obligations, and the time spent on everyday tasks such as eating, grooming, etc, we are left with as little as 15-20 free waking hours each week.
Now consider the life of somebody who works 30 hours a week in a moderate paying job. This person will likely perform significantly fewer work related tasks outside of the workplace, and will likely require less at-home preparation for their job. Even after adding in their other weekly obligations, we’re left with 60+ free waking hours each week. The person who chooses time over money is left with ample time to devote to whatever interests them. Whether that means volunteering in their community or at their children’s school, taking on a personally rewarding task such as writing a book or learning to play a musical instrument, or simply playing Madden ‘09 for as much time each week as a lawyer spends at the office, they are free to define their own life however they see fit, as opposed to having it defined for them by an employer within the confines of a high-stress career. I don’t know about you, but I’m willing to drive a Toyota and cook my meals at home in exchange for almost 8 hours a day to spend as I see fit.
The people I know who are living the current version of the American Dream are mostly people I don’t envy at all. Sure they might have more stuff than I have. They live in nicer homes. They make more money. They have an iPhone, big flat screen TVs, and endless wardrobes. They eat out at nice restaurants all the time. They have subordinates at work. But they also tend to be single or in strained relationships. They don’t have time for their families. They have lots of projects that they’d like to take on, but simply don’t have the time. They are teetering on top of a mountain of debt and financial obligations that would bury them should something happen to their high-paying job. They are stressed. When they do have leisure time, they seem to be burdened by a need to cram months of fun or relaxation into a couple of days. Most of all, their identity is defined by what they do to make a living.
I choose to work as a bartender because it affords me the lifestyle that I want. I spend lots of time with my wife. We go on lots of small trips together. We go hiking and camping. We have time to talk to each other. I’ve written two books on topics that interest me. I teach music at a local high school and elementary school. I play gigs when they come along. I dabble in computer programming. I draw, paint, and create digital art. I write music. I have time to see movies and watch TV. I read a lot of books. I cook. I build furniture. I have a blog. I have time to spend on things that I like to do. I am happy. I am not poor. Most importantly, my life is defined by my personality and interests. I’m not a bartender, that just happens to be my steadiest source of income. I am living my own American dream, and it doesn’t involve a mercedes and a white picket fence, and it certainly does NOT involve a 9-5.
